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They withhold their sexual favors while they are wooed by men.In the calculus of relationships, people figure out their own worth, and then effectively try to engage with someone of equivalent or better value.They come to me and share their pain and concerns that they have to start dating again. It is much easier for a man in his 40s to find desirable dating partners of the female persuasion. You need only look at the numbers to figure out why.This is when I get to share with them the good news. To begin with, there are more women than men in society.One, that younger women are no longer interested in dating men who are even just slightly (3-5 years) older than them and sometimes want to date men 5-10 years younger then them. Alas, the women with whom he wants to get serious are 27-34.Two, women seem to be content in the fact that they are independent and self-sufficient and have a career, family and friends that fulfills them and don’t seem to be interested in truly finding a relationship. This gives men time to court, fall in love, travel together, move in, get engaged, and enjoy a few years of childless marriage before starting a family.You could be "Fertile Myrtle" and they might not know it simply because you're over 35 and they didn't bother to ask because you didn't fit the criteria.—Boys learn to chase girls in high school and college.

So a 45-year-old-man dating a 25-year-old-woman is cool.

In online situations, women say they want desperately to meet a nice guy like me, but never answer my response to their profile. They have a lot of dating options, they’re building their careers, and there isn’t a clear urgency to settle down.

I am trying to remain positive, but two things are really bothering me. Once a guy crosses 35, however, he (theoretically) tends to get more serious.

It’s the same exact advice I give to women in their early 40’s who want men in their early 40’s…except men in their early 40’s want women in their 30’s. I’m being a bit unfair, Adam, because there IS a market for a 42-year-old man – and you can certainly be doing better than you’re currently doing. I’m looking for a LTR but with that said I’ m not willing to settle.

Pick up a copy of Finding The One Online and it should make a difference. But the bigger takeaway is that ALL of us are very judgmental on age. To a 42-year-old man who wants his own biological children, anything above 36 is getting into risky territory. I’m a 37 year old woman and have online dated off and on over the years. I would date a 42 year old, not a problem, but as you say, men in their 40’s are looking for women who are in the 27-34 year old bracket.




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