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I, fortunately, was able to mess up and not have that problem.

But I came out of the emotional winter a completely different person, completely different set of priorities.

It is a very unfortunate thing that over the course of those early years that I made some of the mistakes that I made and I hate that. If I had a man or men in my life speaking to me, saying, “You need to really reconsider what you’re doing here,” I’m convinced I would not have made some of those choices.

I would often prey upon the single mothers who probably didn’t have a lot of confidence in themselves, because they were single moms and whatever and I would show them a good time and invariably within a month or two months into the relationship, they would want something else and I would be done, because I wasn’t ready.

I just knew that if I did not have some sort of relationship, I did not feel whole.

I did not feel like a man if somebody was not dangling from my arm. I’ve always called it my “emotional winter.”I went through that emotional winter and I came out the other side a different person than I was before.

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I do agree with Kyle in waiting to date after divorce until you have a better sense of who you are and like who you are.* I don’t think you have to wait until you have complete clarity on that – dating may help bring that clarity but you’ll definitely want to wait before you commit to another serious relationship.I remember when I got divorced, the online dating thing had really started to come out of the closet. Quite frankly, I felt that it was like shooting fish in a barrel.I remember one weekend, I kid you not, I had eight dates over four days.I literally lived as the parent and then I lived as the rock star single guy, but neither of those two met.I can only be thankful I was able to hide my mistakes behind their nap time. So many dads don’t have that and I talk about the fact that when you screw up and when you’ve got a kid that’s 11, 12 years old, they’re going to see everything you do.




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